When you're at Guyanese event- there is always comedy.


I slept all day today- I have an exam to study for that is this Wednesday and I haven't cracked thy books.

*sigh* living in the moment.

:)

our time has not blessing in it anymore.

I lay in bed- and my days seem to go faster and faster and I never have the chance to truly think those thoughts that are caving in on me and which are having a huge effect to my life and the people surrounding me.

breathe. pause. realize.

We asked our mom's aunt what her birthday wish was and she said the following:

"I pray not wish that when I die and leave this life I pray that people will pray for me"


....I was walking to the max this morning for coffee-everyone was sleeping and I didn't want to wake them up in the morning with the coffee machine grinding the beans, as I was walking the leaves were dropping, the air was fresh, I felt happy- and what my aunt said struck a cord within me that has not being stuck for a long time.

What dreams to come my friend, so many roads to be choosen and walked, dad says my life has just begun- theres not a stop sign in sight and I like that.

I think I'm going to watch "Sweet November" again that movie is too good- I always end up crying in the end.

We meet people in our life time has a test, a learning experience to gain in strength- It's all a learning experience. When adversity meets us meet it with a smile because in the end there is always a lesson to be taken from- and that's what makes the soul strong- When you are crying, or writing your heart out or doing whatever when in distress thinking life will never be the same again "I will never be the same again" and often and very often this "reoccuring question" lurks within us "How do I go on from here to live life" "Have I srewed myself over" all I can truly and firmly say to anyone "Time will heal" and trust me it does. All I can be right now , all I can be right now to people is be their "rock" I will offer that...

The dry pain that stoned my inside is gone. I'm new again-AlamdiouAllah.

it's called life.

you live and you learn. you gain and you loose. you laugh, you cry. you love and you hait. you live and you die.

i need time away from Edmonton.

i need to go running... my sides need to pain a little.

my head hurts me!

and im lacking in sleep-very suprised i haven't got sick at all- for all the damnation stress.hustling to and from i have done to my body.

so many road trips. so many late nights. so many emotions going through me- it's not even a roller coaster but a line zipping straight - you know those lines on those heart monitors when a person dies and it just beeps..and beeps.. and beeps..and thus is continious into the after life- yeh that's how my mind and heart feels- that equals the equation of my emotions-it's a continious line on the road -


a hot tub is needed on my deck.. with candles and the air surrounding me - with the thoughts in my head whispering to me.

-I have become too bold with people-

k im going to sleep- before I talk of more jiber..jabbah...


let's meet in my dreams tonight- I hope I dream of you- Last time you were smiling-

apolgies my friend.

I was going to type up this long emotional blog about summer and the experiences I had- But naeeemm some things must be kept within- acha?

I just came back from the movies- me and mama saw "Nanny Diarie" when I was reading the summary to my mom asking her if she would like to view it- She said that leading actress's life in the movie is very similar to myself- and thus was true while me and mama were watching the movie- Throughtout the whole thing my mom would be smiling grishly to her self or to me from the corner of her eyes- Honestly just dl it or read the synoposis- "Nanny Diaries".

A really good "MUST SEE" after Ramadan is "Redention" too much to type about and get into- But looks like an amazing movie just like "crash" and all those great "lifish/altering experience" movies that came out this year.

__________
Maybe I should talk about my trip to Toronto- Words cannot express how much fun it was and the beauty I experienced. I walked my cousins children (which are my second cousins) to a park within my uncle's hood- The sun was setting- kids were outside screaming and playing- calypso music was playing in the surroundings- West Indian people were jamming their talk- It felt like I was back in Guyana.

My ma's aunt's 60th SUPRISE B-day was a blast- all of my family were there- all of em- we chilled till 3 in the morning eating beef patties and take in from chinese halhal eateries- we talked, we laughed, we danced, we cried, we remembered.

I swam in lake ontario- the water was warm, and comforting to my skin.

I honestly.. Want to live in Toronto- It's the only place where I feel alive- and me- I was so loud and full of energy- cracking jokes- I noticed the small things I took for granted and I compared my personality to here in Edmonton around people and it's so grey and when I'm Toronto I'm bursting with colors- I felt that heat- I haven't felt that for a long time.

Khair InshAllah :)

Oh golly macfolly