Sometimes words are too inadeuqate to explain the thoughts and feelings steaming through your mind, and one picture pinpoints everything your dreaming, feeling, wishing, and praying for. It's nice outside, storms coming in, it's windy, and the clouds are grey, glooming down onto me. I stood on my patio, and smiled, it was a scary feeling, aweing, hoping for something mystical to happen, and I did what I was longing for , through out the whole week. I just lifted my face up to the sky, closed my eyes, and smiled, I'm at peace, AlamdiouAllah, felt soothing.
AlamdiouAllah i've being at peace for sometime now within myself, nothing bothering me too much, or pain striking. I do have things to take care of, and stuff to think through, I just term em, and place them under the " life category thinking"- everyone as to think about lifeish thinking things, that's why we were placed here.
Lastnight, I cleaned up my room. All the clothes playing hills on my carpet, all the hijabs throwing about, makeup brushes in spots where they shouldn't be, my desk was still cluttered with study notes of Durkheim, ( I can't even spell he name ), my research paper which I worked hard on, and after I just ditched it in the pile o "garbage" know worries I have it saved in email. I changed my pillowcases, sprayed my room with room spray that spells of vanilla, and I dusted my window sill, adjusted my curtians, and taddada my room was clean. I went to bed at mid-night, and I had to wake up for work this morning at eight. AlamdiouAllah I stuck to my plan cleaned up my room, and I feel good. Tomorrow I need to send out emails, do updates, plan something, or brainstorm some things, get myself into a cpr course. My mom asked me why I want to get my cpr- to do it in August, I told her tomorrow is "never", a uncle told me that. So nextweekend Imma try and get myself into the course, and finish it, it's a day and a half, and the girl seems pretty cool, and hip . I think, well it's good to be trained in cpr, with jobs and stuff now a days. Yeh well fathers day is coming up nextweekend, and yeh I'm hauling the family to breakfast next week Sunday morning, it's about time. Banff is approaching, and the symposium, I can't wait to hear Dr.Bilial Philips talk. Sigh, just hearing dad talk about him, gives me that fire. Yeh I've attending Islamic events, with talented, and knowledgable speakers, and Sheikhs, MashaAllah their all extremely well, it's just something abouth Philips.
Yeh, my mind and heart is at ease, all my planning, and stuff for the summer, I've got organized, I want to take a hot air ballon ride InshaAllah. Sometimes it feels so good to be alone, I know in a week or so I'm going to look at this entry and throw cherry seeds at the screen in anger, saying no! it doesn't feel good to be alone, hey what can I say I'm relaying the foundation that was broken, this time Im using cement, solid.
Cherries are good, watch im going to get a tummy ache :D
AlamdiouAllah i've being at peace for sometime now within myself, nothing bothering me too much, or pain striking. I do have things to take care of, and stuff to think through, I just term em, and place them under the " life category thinking"- everyone as to think about lifeish thinking things, that's why we were placed here.
Lastnight, I cleaned up my room. All the clothes playing hills on my carpet, all the hijabs throwing about, makeup brushes in spots where they shouldn't be, my desk was still cluttered with study notes of Durkheim, ( I can't even spell he name ), my research paper which I worked hard on, and after I just ditched it in the pile o "garbage" know worries I have it saved in email. I changed my pillowcases, sprayed my room with room spray that spells of vanilla, and I dusted my window sill, adjusted my curtians, and taddada my room was clean. I went to bed at mid-night, and I had to wake up for work this morning at eight. AlamdiouAllah I stuck to my plan cleaned up my room, and I feel good. Tomorrow I need to send out emails, do updates, plan something, or brainstorm some things, get myself into a cpr course. My mom asked me why I want to get my cpr- to do it in August, I told her tomorrow is "never", a uncle told me that. So nextweekend Imma try and get myself into the course, and finish it, it's a day and a half, and the girl seems pretty cool, and hip . I think, well it's good to be trained in cpr, with jobs and stuff now a days. Yeh well fathers day is coming up nextweekend, and yeh I'm hauling the family to breakfast next week Sunday morning, it's about time. Banff is approaching, and the symposium, I can't wait to hear Dr.Bilial Philips talk. Sigh, just hearing dad talk about him, gives me that fire. Yeh I've attending Islamic events, with talented, and knowledgable speakers, and Sheikhs, MashaAllah their all extremely well, it's just something abouth Philips.
Yeh, my mind and heart is at ease, all my planning, and stuff for the summer, I've got organized, I want to take a hot air ballon ride InshaAllah. Sometimes it feels so good to be alone, I know in a week or so I'm going to look at this entry and throw cherry seeds at the screen in anger, saying no! it doesn't feel good to be alone, hey what can I say I'm relaying the foundation that was broken, this time Im using cement, solid.
Cherries are good, watch im going to get a tummy ache :D
posted by Surrendering at 8:19 PM
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